You are going out with a man or woman and having a good time. Then he or she touches your hand or caresses the side of your face, and says, “I love you.” This is, or certainly should be, a common occurrence in married couples and those who have strong and lasting relationships. If this happens on the first date, however, it can be confusing. Touch and love in dating ought to go hand in hand, so to speak. As you and your sweetheart come closer together the first parts of intimacy typically include holding hands, a kiss, a warm hug. If your sole purpose in dating is casual sex, however, there is a disconnect between touch and love in dating. There are compatible sexual partners who just want to jump in the sack for the fun of it. If the two of you like to touch, without any other obligations, good for you. Just don’t forget the condoms. If, on the other hand one of you longs for an abiding and strong relationship and the other just likes the touch part, one of you is going to get hurt eventually. With this and other thoughts in mind, here is a bit about touch and love in dating.

As I Do and Not As I Say

There are folks in the dating world who are really good at flirting, both with their eyes and with the occasional caress or kiss. Many of these folks are also very accomplished at getting just what they want, be it presents, commitments, or money. Not all of the folks who are accomplished at generating heat in a relationship want to follow through, unfortunately. That is another disconnect between touch and love in dating. If you are dating someone who seems to keep promising more but always has excuses maybe he or she is just interested in what he or she can get from you and not interested in a close and intimate relationship. There are, in fact, men and women who find it difficult to be close to other people. They may secretly fear touch and love in dating. If this is the case with your boyfriend or girlfriend you will want to decide just how long you want the dance to go on before you slip out the side door, alone, and take a taxi home. If you are the person who finds it hard to deal with touch and love in a relationship, there are counselors who can help. Don’t think that you need to be afraid and lonely your entire life. Go get some help.

Which Comes First?

Touch and love in dating go together, eventually. But, do you have to wait for a serious commitment to ask for a kiss? Are two of you are so physically attracted that you find yourselves making love all night on your first date? Couples arrive at a happy combination of touch and love in dating by various routes. What seems to be the common factor in happiness in this regard is honesty and openness. Talk about how you feel and talk about what you like to do. Talk about a future, together and convert touch and love in dating into a happy life together.