Sacrifice for love is great in romance novels but can be treacherous in a dating relationship.

Sometimes relationships are difficult and we need to sacrifice for love. This may be simply giving up the pleasures of a single life in order to raise a family. Or it may be giving up hopes of your own education in order to further the ambitions of your partner. If your loved one becomes ill you may find yourself providing nursing care in addition to working at your job and raising the kids. This degree of sacrifice for love requires a depth of commitment. This sort of sacrifice for love requires a depth of love that often takes a lifetime to attain.

Sacrifice for love can also be a trap. Sometimes our partners in life are takers and not givers. Spending years tolerating verbal or physical abuse is not really sacrifice for love. Putting up with such a life is never a good idea and is not sacrifice for love. It is a life of fear. Unfortunately there are individuals who only feel good if they are constantly giving, until they are wrung out, tired, and resentful. Then years of sacrifice for love bring them to a sense of a lost life and deep resentment.

The point in dating is to be looking for someone who is fun, someone who will be easy to live with, and someone who helps shoulder his or her fair share of the work of a relationship. In dating someone we find out first hand if this is the person we want to see again and eventually the person we want to spend our life with. Sacrifice for love should be part of a weepy soap opera and not part of how to find that special someone with whom to spend your life.

With these thoughts in mind here are a couple of suggestions when dating.

Beware Of A Sense Of Obligation To Someone Whom You Barely Know

If you are a caretaker by nature this is a trap. You could end up with someone who habitually manipulates people into doing their work for them or continually sympathizing with their imagined troubles. If your new friend is always laying problems on your doorstep tell them to find a counselor and come to the next date with a smile on their face and their problems solved.

Be Clear About What You And Your New Friend Want In Life

When it looks like your relationship is getting serious it is a good idea to talk about what each of you wants out of life. If advanced education, military service, or time for travel before settling down are in the picture for either of you make sure that the other is not left waiting or footing the bill for the other. A healthy relationship often involves a lot of working together but it should not involve undue sacrifice for love without a very clear agreement about both persons benefitting in the end.

Taking On The Role Of A Caretaker

Beware of confusing the fact that you feel sorry for someone with being in love with them. Many feel good about helping others. Many young people feel more mature and proud of themselves when taking on such an adult-like role. But, if your new friend has significant health, mental health, or other issues it is absolutely OK to remain a friend and look elsewhere for the support and comfort that comes from a healthy dating and sexual relationship. In this case you can certainly sacrifice for love but the sacrifice need not be your personal life and need not take away your chance for a good life.

Remember That You Are a Good And Valuable Person

Do not fall into the trap of believing that you need to sacrifice for love in order to worthy. You and every other person on the planet is worthy and deserving of attention, affection, and a good life. You should not plan to sacrifice to obtain love. Just Look around a bit and you will find someone who thinks you are the best thing even in their life.