Contrary to popular belief seduction is not just about being tall, strong and handsome. You need to open your mouth and say something if you want to seduce a girl. And we are not just talking about pickup lines although that can be a good way to start a conversation.

What pickup lines are useful in getting a man or woman’s attention? What pickup lines result in your going out with the person? What pickup lines simply label you as a bore or fool? Just what are pickup lines and how can we use them in online dating as well as in a chance encounter. Does whistling at a passing girl qualify as a pickup line or is it better to think of something intelligent to say. And, are intelligent comments pickup lines or do they label you as an interesting person who is not interested in an intimate relationship? When planning to use pickup lines think of Goldilocks and the three bears and the porridge. There is too hot, too cold, and just right.

Saying that you really like a girl’s large breasts is way too forward. And talking incessantly about your work, politics or your “ex” without even an attempt at a compliment is just cold and confusing. But there is a just right “goldilocks” path that can lead to successful seduction.

The most successful pickup lines are often just sincere things that we say to people. Going out of your way to complement a person that you know or, perhaps, just barely know is a great way to spark a bit of interest without over the top flattery or a cold recitation of your list of interests. Once you have the undivided attention of the man or woman in whom you have an interest, a clear expression of your interest in him or her as a person often works just fine. Smile and say, I would love to spend more time with you. It is a better pickup line than the comment that your friends on the street corner might have liked and more likely to get you the attention and love that you want and deserve.

How to seduce a girl by talking starts with getting her attention. Once you have her to yourself compliments are always welcome. We wrote recently about mixed attractiveness relationships. These relationships progress and bear fruit when the couple talks.

In the 1987 movie Roxanne comes to love intelligent, resourceful and poetic Charlie despite his unattractive looks when she gets to know him.

The point is that in the movie Charlie communicates. He writes and he talks. In the real world it is definitely possible to seduce a girl by talking but you need to talk about her, about interesting things, about a possible life together and not about yourself, your ex or a saved up bag of grievances. Girls like a confident man and they like to have fun. They like to communicate and so you really can seduce a girl by talking. Just take your time, develop a friendship and slowly but surely add the romance.