Lots of us like to flirt to get someone’s attention. We may use a tried and true pickup line and then play hard to get to see what happens. But, sometimes that approach does not work out. In order to avoid dating mistakes and personal disasters we suggest five useful dating rules in no particular order of importance.

Don’t Play Too Hard to Get

If you wonder if he really cares about you it can be useful to make him (or her) work a little. If your new friend does not make any effort to regain your attention you might just be dating someone who lacks the stamina to develop a healthy and happy long term relationship, lacks interest in persons of your gender or has a hidden sexual partner that you don’t know about. On the other hand if you play too hard to get your new friend may simply decide that there are other fish in the sea and pick the next person who contacted him on the online dating site. The first of our five useful dating rules is don’t play too hard to get.

Not Everyone Gives Good Dating Advice

Whenever you have problems in a relationship you talk to your best friend, sister or coworker. And, whatever the advice is and no matter how closely you follow it things don’t work out. When we wrote our article Dating Advice from the Crowd we mentioned Dear Abby. The main reason that Dear Abby survived is that the person writing the column gave good advice! The point is that not everyone gives good dating advice. The second of our useful dating rules is to keep this fact mind and don’t continually follow advice from people who don’t have a clue about how you should deal with your issues.

Spontaneity Is Good within Limits

Nobody likes you if you are dull and never want to do new things. Learn to try new things. Go to new places and make new friends. It will broaden and enrich your life and make you interesting and attractive to others. But spontaneity is good within limits. In our article about the Tinder Dating Disaster we mentioned a situation in which a little common sense and patience would have made all the difference.

You Both Need Room to Breathe

A common mistake that men make in relationships is to try to fix the problem when their friend, partner or spouse is upset. But a common problem for women is believing that their friend, partner or spouse is not listening. So, remember that you both need room to breathe. Learn to take a time out. Listen to what she has to say and don’t immediately respond. Learn to say, I hear you. And don’t immediately try to fix the issue. That is our next of five useful dating rules.

Take Care of Yourself First and Foremost

To thine own self be true wrote Shakespeare. This is the first way to avoid an abusive relationship. Learn to like yourself and you will be less likely to submit to physical or psychological abuse. This starts with the first date and is the most important of our five useful dating rules.