Are you are new to the world of dating? Or are you back in the dating scene after breaking up with your last partner? In either case, it is useful to think about what you are looking for when you go out with someone. In short, do you want a love life or a relationship? Hopefully you want and will attain both. But for starters you should decide what your focus is and proceed accordingly.

Do You Want a Love Life or a Relationship: Love Life First

Way back when we wrote about how to manage a hot first date.

If your interest is physical attraction above all other aspects of a relationship you will want an attractive person. So, you need to see photos.

Not all hot first dates require movie star attractiveness. There are lots of interesting, alluring, sexy people with fairly average looks. A bright smile, a suggestive glance, and revealing garments can lead the way to a hot first date. Because of the chance that the first date will be a disappointment a women may want to wear a jacket over her revealing dress.

Do not forget that if your wish is for a hot first date that protection is important. Bring condoms and do not expect your hot first date to take all of the precautions.

The point is that if you are looking for romance and sex you need to make that your focus. If you want this date to move on the more dates and a happy relationship then you need to consider that as well. But, first things should come first. If you want sex on the first date and every date thereafter you need to make plans and follow through.

Do You Want a Love Life or a Relationship: Relationship First

There are people we find attractive but when we get to know them we encounter all sorts of problems. A nice part about online dating is that we can screen out the problems before even the first date. You don’t need an abusive relationship or a serial dater who is unable to form meaningful relationships with anyone.

The most successful route in seeking a happy relationship online starts with giving a little thought to what sort of person you want to meet, what special criteria such as cultural background you find important, social and economic status, and other factors.

Communication leads to lasting relationships as well. You are looking for someone who talks and who listens.

The person you met on the internet may be attractive and even wealthy. But, does he or she talk to you? Is he or she funny? When he or she does talk is it in communication or complaints, orders, and/or boring details of the past that you hear? Communication is a two way street. Give and take are the basics of good communication. When looking for someone to spend your life with look for a person who talks to you and listens to you, not someone who lectures or talks as though you were not there.

But, once you get to know each other, like each other, and want to live a life together, will there be any romance?

Do You Want a Love Life or a Relationship: Yes to Both

The ideal situation for most of us is a healthy and satisfying relationship with romance and sex as an integral part. That having been said, most of us will take a two pronged approach. We look for someone who is easy to get along with and we look for someone who finds us attractive. The most satisfying life should contain a happy relationship with lots of sex as well.