When you go out on dates are you looking for enjoyable relationships or just thinking of how to get sex on the first date? Both are possible, but not always with the same persons. Our repeated advice is to go out on a date to have a good time, socialize, meet someone new and let the more serious aspects of relationships happen in their own good time. In this regard, not all enjoyable relationships end up being sexual relationships. There are people who are interesting and fun to be with who are not currently available for a serious relationship. They may travel a lot, be stationed overseas in the military or be totally immersed in building a career or a new business. Do not discard enjoyable relationships just because they do not lead to the bedroom or the marriage altar. On the other hand take care of yourself and do not find yourself waiting forever for someone who will never be available to you except on occasion.
Making Your Relationship Enjoyable
We meet someone special. We become very close. We develop a long term happy relationship, get married and have children. Then the stuff of life takes over our relationship. There are diapers and doctor visits, putting off vacations because of school events and sharing your relationship with whole herd of little people. Enjoyable relationships do not need to suffer when they advance into family and child rearing. First of all, we assume that you have children because you wanted them. So, enjoy them. Each first step, first day of school or part in a school play will never come again to be present to those things and do so together. Enjoyable relationships are not just alone time but sharing the things of life. And, find time to be together as well.
Finding Time and Not Apologizing
Schedule time to be together and abide by the schedule. A friend of mine traveled for a living and at times was only home for a week out of the month. When another business need threatened to take away his home time he replied that his schedule was not open until such and such date. He did not explain that the thing on his schedule that prevented his being in Chicago, New York, etc. was that he was at home and spending time with his wife. He did not apologize or explain. He simply gave his home life and relationship high priority. This sort of planning tends to lead to long term enjoyable relationships.
The Two of You Fit or You Do Not
Do enjoyable relationships just happen or are they created? Can they be destroyed? All are true. Work together, to communicate and share your common interests. Work together and communicate, as communication leads to lasting relationships. But, remember that you get to choose whom you spend your life with. There are people who have mutually incompatible interests. If this is the case with you and that cute guy you met, spare yourself the pain and get out before you get hurt. If that beautiful woman you met only thinks of herself find someone else before she breaks your heart and empties your wallet as well. Enjoyable relationships evolve with time. Take your time and have a good time when you go out on a date.