You have found the man of woman of your dreams. You are chatting via the internet, meeting face for the first time, or happily spending time together as you develop a relationship. Remember to keep things in the present. Going out together should be fun. If going out with your new friend is enjoyable that is a good indication that the two of you will develop a long lasting, satisfying, and healthy relationship. Do not share information too soon when building a relationship. The kind of information we are talking about has to do with difficult breakups, sad relationships, and things that you should be talking about with a counselor. Do not share information too soon when building a relationship if what you are sharing turns things into a therapy session. Nothing ruins a hot first date so much as talking about how things were in your previously relationship. Nothing is worse for a developing relationship than bringing an unnecessary third person into the picture day after day and night after night. Too much sharing on a first date is not a good thing and it can ruin a flowering romance as well.
Communication Pitfalls and Appropriate Timing
When your new friend says , “tell me a little about yourself.” They are typically interested in keeping the conversation going and finding out something fun and interesting about you. If you want to avoid having a short evening and do not start on a long, dull story about how sad your life has been ever since you spouse walked out a year ago. You are not going to get sex on the first date by talking about things that bug you or things that make you angry. Compliments almost always work. But beware of using pickup lines when you are already on a date with the man or woman of your dreams. Do not share information too soon when building a relationship even if it is important information. For example, if you had a colorful youth and were briefly in trouble with the law it may be appropriate to bring this up when the time is right. However, if you decide to break off a developing relationship with someone you may not them to know about something in your past that has nothing to do with them and can only cause you trouble. The same applies to illnesses in the family, family concerns, finances, etc. Likewise, long term planning is appropriate when the two of you are ready for a long term commitment. Before that do not share information too soon when building a relationship.
When It Is Appropriate To Share Things
If you have joined the military and are shipping out in a month it is appropriate to mention that when you are developing a relationship. Likewise if you have a terminal illness or a contagious sexual disease the other person deserves to know even if telling them may break off the relationship. Relationships are for the long term. Do not ruin them before they get started. Stay in the present and save the details for when things get serious. And, do not trick your friend into thinking that you are available when you are leaving, already married, or have some other reason why it will not work out.